A Filthy Little Hello

One thing I’ve noticed about our culture is that it has become okay for us to use foul words to address each other. Well, actually, I’m sure I’ve noticed it for a while, but it’s started to affect me more recently because I’m seeing the trend played out in Christian culture as well. I particularly feel drawn to focus on women because this is where I see it most often, though I’m sure men participate in this as well. There seems to be a tendency to call each other names and somehow give vulgar words a positive definition. You probably hear it all the time, if you think about it. A popular address nowadays may be “Hey, Bitch,” or “Hey, Hoe,” as if their relationship with that person suddenly makes something about the word “bitch” or “whore” cute and amiable. I don’t really know how this trend was brought on. Most likely through pop culture hip-hop/rap artists or reality TV idols. But I wonder who actually thinks about what they’re saying. As far as I am concerned (and the dictionary, for that matter), those words have very negative denotations and connotations (unless, of course, you’re a dog breeder and are literally talking about a female dog). Since when did we create these exceptions? For instance, it’s okay to greet someone this way and it can be endearing, but if you were to call that same person the same thing when they’re not around, then it is mean and slanderous.

Whether or not the person doesn’t care that you’ve just called them a whore, what suggestion are you implying through using that word? In my opinion this does nothing to build up anyone, rather it tears at their personal beauty, character and respect. Likewise, it does nothing to build up your character either, if you are the one using it. Now I know that our conversational word usage is not of Victorian era propriety, but there is still something to say for being a lady and for presenting yourself with modesty and the desire to build up others. Just like the importance of dressing modestly, it is important to clothe yourself with modest language. Ephesians 4:29 tells us, “do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs that it may benefit those who listen.” If you greeted your friend this way in public, what might those people walking by assume about your character? They might not give two cents how you’ve just addressed your friend, but as God’s children who are called to be lights in the world, what if this is the one and only chance you get to show that particular passerby a little of God’s light? The same goes for Twitter and Facebook. What are you showing your non-Christian friends about the Christian life when you post things that make it look like you are more part of this world than not? 

My sisters, let’s illuminate our desire for purity in all areas, including our speech!

In Colossians chapter 3, Paul addresses rules for holy living, which have been extremely convicting to me. He commands that we must “rid [ourselves] of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips” (Col. 3:8). This list deals primarily with speech that expresses hatred to other people. While a person’s intention may not be to express hate to that person by addressing them in one of the ways I’ve shown, I believe the connotative and denotative meanings of these words are undoubtedly foul and hateful. This should also be a reminder to us also that the same thing goes along with using bad language and cursing in general. While I am not an authority to tell you that this is what you must do to be an exemplary Christian, I do think that we should all strive towards purity in our lives. And our speech is no exception. If you continue reading this passage, there is also an important reminder that is pointed out to us. That we are to “clothe [ourselves] with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.” We are to “bear with each other” and forgive each other as the Lord has forgiven us (Col. 3:12-14). So, if you are witness to one of your sisters using such coarse language, remember to practice these things. Things like gentleness and, of course, forgiveness.

I know that one argument against what I’m saying might be: “well, I’m just joking. They know that. My friends don’t take it seriously.” I’ve actually heard it before, in my own house. Whether or not you’re intending to joke, however, this does not eliminate the meaning behind the word you’ve chosen to use. You can’t take back the impression you might’ve just made on someone around you. The Bible tells us that there is to “be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving” (Ephesians 5:4, emphasis added). Thanksgiving means to express thanks to God. My question is: shouldn’t our friends, even our acquaintances, feel that we genuinely thank God for who they are? For who He has created them to be? Using bawdy, vulgar, coarse language seems to me to demean that. Instead of greeting our sisters by spitting out filth at them, let us come to each other expressing joy, love and thanksgiving for who they are and the special influence they have in our lives. For, as sisters in Christ, there is a special dearness that we hold to each other that can’t be seen anywhere else. So, treat each other dearly, remembering this bond.

Instead of filling ourselves with crude language that will undoubtedly, eventually trickle into our own speech, let us remember God’s Word and His desire for us to love each other. Our desire should be to build each other up, in love, with Jesus as our prime example. “Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God” (Col. 3:16). 

Thoughts On Writing (from and inspired by CS Lewis)

CS Lewis was, of course, an amazing writer, who wrote with both truth and imagination. What an inspiration! And as I try to make sense of the plan that God has for me, I'm reminded that I have a gift and a passion for writing. Sadly, this summer (aka my supposed "summer to write") didn't turn into much of a writing summer after all. Instead, I've seen much of this summer wasted on re-watching movies that aren't that great and checking Facebook when I'm not working. As I read through this list of rules for good writing by CS Lewis, I paid special attention to the first one in particular. Here are his "rules" sent to a girl who was looking to him for tips on writing (my own commentary is added in for kicks after the "<--"):

1. Turn off the radio (and the television). <-- why can't I seem to do this this summer!?
2. Read good books and avoid most magazines. <-- I feel like I do this.
3. Write with the ear, not the eye. Make every sentence sound good. <-- I couldn't agree more.
4. Write only about things that interest you. If you have no interests, you won't ever be a writer. <--well, I think I have interests... is too many a problem?
5. Be clear. Remember that readers can't know your mind. Don't forget to tell them exactly what they need to know to understand you. <-- makes sense.
6. Save odds and ends of writing attempts, because you may be able to use them later. <-- this is definitely true, yet I somehow convince myself that my "odds and ends" aren't good material and sometimes (usually) just delete them from my computer.
7. You need a well-trained sense of word-rhythm, and the noise of a typewriter will interfere.
8. Know the meaning of every word you use <-- something I am learning since I started writing in 3rd grade.

And a very helpful and encouraging quote that has been officially dubbed my quote (maybe of my writing life):

"Even in literature and art, no man who bothers about originality will ever be original: whereas if you simply try to tell the truth (without caring twopence how often it has been told before) you will, nine times out of ten, become original without ever having noticed it" ~CS Lewis

Oh, I do hope that I will write. More. Often. Always.

Unproductive Day

Sometimes I come across a word, and I have to look up the definition. Many times, I will know generally what the word means, but I often times find that the word has a more powerful dictionary definition that I thought. Take the word unproductive. One of the definitions of this word, according to Webster’s is: “not producing or able to produce large amounts of goods, crops, or other commodities.” Usually, when we use the word unproductive, we consider mainly the other definition: “not achieving much; not very useful.” I think that both are very good definitions, but the one that hit me the most today was the first of these, which mainly refers to the unproductivity of land, etc.

I thought of this word initially because, well, today was a very unproductive day, generally speaking. Although I felt relaxed and enjoyed the time I spent reading a new book and lounging outside in the sunshine, something kept telling me I could probably be making better use out of my time. I got this feeling that I was somehow being unproductive. Now, don’t get me wrong. I think that time spent reading a good book and relaxing is perfectly good, but my feeling of unproductivity today stemmed from neglecting to spend time with God.  That something that kept tugging at me was someone, namely the Holy Spirit, reminding me that my time spent with God is essential, even on a day spent entirely at home with no obligations whatsoever.

I don’t know why it is, that it’s sometimes easier to neglect spending time with my King when I have a day that is completely free. I have no time restrictions like work or school or commitments that overbusy my daily schedule. Nothing. Yet, relax mode seems to kick in so easily without thought of beginning my relaxing day spending time with Him.

The realization that I had today is that we can feel like we need these relaxing days, to refresh and rejuvenate, but if we aren’t dedicating that day to the Lord, then it is going to be entirely unproductive. You will be unproductive. What crops can He grow within us when our time spent with Him is replaced by sunshine and literature? These might feel rejuvenating, like the things that we need, but they are not nearly as rejuvenating as the time we can spend with the Lord. Only He produces good fruit, good crops, in us. Not sunshine, not a good movie at home.

And, I also realized that having a completely open day like this one can have potentially dangerous consequences, if we do not give it to the Lord first. Time devoted to God protects us from succumbing to our fleshly desires, sins, and temptations. Because, on a day that is completely free from all commitments, our commitment to strive towards living a pure life might just step outside for a day or so.

So, maybe a day without much going on is ok, but the commitment to spend time with God should always be a priority. Let’s not let ourselves become unproductive, but become instruments of productivity for the Lord, allowing Him to continue to cultivate purity and goodness within us. 

Clothed in Cloud

I think that it’s somewhat easy to look around at all that we have and believe that this is our home. More generally, I think that it’s easy to look at the world and what humans have built and think that life here is all there is. It’s easy to do. We are accustomed to the things we have here around us. We like the world’s comforts: our homes, our clothes, our jobs, our money… The world around us can sometimes be like a big, crazy, LA traffic, Las Vegas slot machine, multiple hula hoops type of place. We’re sucked in. Suckers to the world’s pace, plans, comforts, and desires. And it’s oh-so easy to do, I tell ya.

So, because it can be so easy, sometimes I wonder what it would be like if we were walking around in a vaporous cloud, which prevented us from seeing the world too clearly. When we walk around in this cloud, we are constantly reminded of our separation from this world because, well, we are prevented from completely focusing in on the world around us. Sounds pretty good when you think about what this would mean for our relationships with God. The cloud “cover” would essentially help us to focus more on God and less on what’s going on around us. Maybe the cloud would funnel up towards above, which would make Colossians 3:2 a whole lot easier: “Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.” But, there’s also probably a reason why God hasn’t all put us in cloud suits already. I can’t say for certain why God didn’t do this, but I can take several guesses why.

Unless this magical cloud suit is like a one-way mirror--with us only seeing fogginess and other people looking at us seeing us clearly—then, I’d have to guess that this cloud would probably look pretty cloudy from both angles (both us looking out and others looking in). Of course, we are to consider ourselves outside of this world, but if all other people can see is clouds of mist floating by, then what can actually be shown? By looking like everyone else (in the one sense of being human, that is, and not a cloud), we break the barrier of a possible “I’m a cloud and you’re not” kind of mentality. Therefore, what is shown has to come from the inside, where the Holy Spirit is dwelling. That is the difference. Christian, you have the Holy Spirit within you, not a hard-to-see-through cloud around you! Let the Spirit in you help to “clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience” (Colossians 3:12b) so that God may be shown. Have you ever heard the phrase, “the strongest light shines from within”? We aren’t turning ourselves into clouds people can’t see past or actual lights that people can’t look at for fear of blindness. We are showing non-Christians that our focus is something different than the world. And, it can be challenging.

So, if we can’t have a cloud suit or any other disguise that helps redirect our focus from the world to God, what can we do? Walk around with our eyes closed? Seclude ourselves in our homes? Well, I hope you know that these answers are no. Focus on the world is so much more than physically seeing the world around us. Focus has to do with our hearts and minds as well. As Colossians 3:1-2 says, “set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things,” and your focus will be on God. Setting your heart and your mind on the above (on God) will take effort and discipline most of the time, especially because, like I said before, we are suckers to what the world offers. However, the resulting effects of choosing to set your hearts and minds on Him will be an indescribable joy and contentment that, I can guarantee, the world does not offer.

Called to Purity

Charles Wesley once prayed to God, "Make me and keep me pure within." I feel like God has drastically shown me what it means to live a pure life for Him. There are so many elements of my life that have been altered or completely obliterated for the sake of pursuing purity in my daily life. Those people who've known me before and after my salvation could tell you that something is definitely different. Although I constantly struggle with purifying my life, I know that He continues to show me areas in my life that need refining. I'm always learning what it means to live purely. At any given time there is at least one thing that I feel God is showing me that is obstructing a healthier Walk with Him.


As I move through and process what living purely for God looks like, I am stricken with the struggle many young women face in keeping their lives pure. I'm definitely one of them too. And I'm reminded that God has called us to be pure and to live lives that are glorifying to Him. But how the heck are we supposed to do this in a world that really has no understanding of purity?


Purity in this case doesn't have to be just sexual. Elizabeth Elliot says, “Purity means freedom from contamination, from anything that would spoil the taste or the pleasure…It means cleanness, clearness—no additives, nothing artificial—in other words, 'all natural' in the sense in which the Original Designer designed it to be.” Of course, since we live in this world, it is not possible to escape sin and be completely blameless. However, I do believe that it is something we should still aim towards! Merely admitting defeat to our sinfulness and not trying to aim towards holiness is just giving us more justification for continuing to sin. Purifying your life means cleaning it out, and allowing God to do it! 


The awesome thing is that we are not left alone to figure out what this means. How do we know what the characteristics of living a pure life are? I sure don't have the answer. But God does, and He's left us His Word and His Spirit to convict us and teach us about what it means to live purely. 


As I write this, I'm hit with the desire to dig into Scripture and see what He says about how to live purely. Maybe my next post will be a continuum of this one. I know this might sound obvious, but really reading the Scriptures and thinking about them and actually applying them to your life is really the best way to live. I admittedly don't do it enough. So, this summer, I want to intentionally seek out intimacy and purity in my relationship with God through Scripture and prayer. Hopefully, I'll share my discoveries here.


“Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.” - Romans 12:2 NLT

The Cover Up

One of the saddest things I see is when someone is so aware that their lifestyle needs changing, but instead of changing it they just cover up some things. Throw a sheet over those things there that they don't want so-and-so to see. Oh, and box up a few of of those over there, keep them reserved for tomorrow when they're not looking. They know that these things are wrong, that they're not benefiting their Walk with God, so they hide them from the godly influencers who might just point them out. Because imagine if that happened! Then we might just have to get rid of them!

I'm definitely not exempt from this. I know when I shouldn't be doing something. Maybe I'm watching a movie that I know I probably shouldn't be watching. It's full of cussing, sexual content, and crude humor, and it's definitely not something I should be watching. What is this movie contributing to my life besides potential for sin or temptation in my life? I feel guilty, maybe even switch back and forth between the channels to make it look like I'm not really watching. When someone comes into the room or walks by, my heart races for fear of being caught. I'm guilty. I know I'm potentially leading myself towards temptation, but I do it anyway.

You know, it probably wouldn't be too bad of a thing for someone to catch me, or us, in things we shouldn't be doing. As Christians, we should be holding each other accountable and rebuking each other gently, in love, so that we can grow stronger in our relationship with God. If we are to desire to be more and more like Christ, then these things got to go! Sometimes we know this, but our own sinful, comfortable desires prevent us from actually saying no. In some cases it's hard to hear the truth from someone close to us, who might just be one of those godly influencers in our lives who you're hiding things from. Sometimes it might be something we don't even immediately recognize we're getting into. So, I guess this is a call for accountability and truth-telling. Not judgement, but love.

So, if I see you starting to push things under a rug when I walk up to you, I hope that I can be a voice that asks you what that's about.

Refuge & Joy

A day spent at home. The air is cold and the wind sends rain splashing up against my window. I can't believe this weather we're having, but I can't help but feel thankful for it. The back patio looks like a still pond, except for the semi-constant patterings of rain. The house is empty except for my family pets: a dog who is curled up on his pillow and a cat who is busy preening herself outside my bedroom door. I love the sound I'm greeted with in my empty house. The soft pitter-patter of raindrops on the roof, a brisk breath of wind, and the crackling of wood burning in the fireplace. Even the lighting is subdued, a peaceful melancholy. The dark sky casts an almost blue hue in the living room, which gets even darker in places of the house where drapes are loosely drawn. Golden embers are a welcome comfort from the corner of the living room.

I choose the couch closest to the fireplace, relishing its warmth. My bare feet still cause me to shiver against the cool sighs of the house, so I search for socks. Maybe it's the laziness of the morning, but I don't think to care whether these socks match. I don one blue and one pink. They're warm, however. While I'm up, I pull two books off of my shelf along with my Bible at my nightstand. A pen is necessary too, I think. My arms full, I pull a blanket across my shoulders like a cloak and return once more to the haggard old couch.

I'm uncertain of my intentions. Time to write, time to read, time to reflect...? The day is before me, but I do not know the hour. There are no plans ahead of me today. There are no interruptions to be expected. There's just my couch, and the knowledge of a open day. I find myself praying with tears, mimicking the rain outside. They are joyful tears. Tears of understanding that I am loved and forgiven, even though I make mistakes over and over again. Tears because I am a sinner, and I don't deserve this love, but He gives it to me freely.

My prayer brings me to a longing for His word. I feel suddenly parched, as if I have traveled days through the desert without water. I'm moved again to tears by the words He shows me there. New soundings of His desire for my life: to discover what pleases Him (Ephesians 5:10). It is like drinking water, an awakening to the re-realization of His calling for my life, and I am overcome with humility, desire, and passion to become more and more like Christ.

I can't begin to tell you how quick it takes for temptations and doubts to creep at me from the shadows, but His word is my sword. He is my refuge. And they return back to their dark corners, as fleeting crows who have no place to feed. It is in his quiet escape from the busy world, from work, from pressures... that I feel renewed and untouchable. While these times are not frequent, I pray that I might seek His refuge daily, despite my circumstances. I pray that I won't allow myself to journey so long in the desert when I have access to replenishment all of the time. What an amazing thought... He does not hide from me!

The following hours (I think) I spend reading, being encouraged by The Word and words of those who desire to discuss the Truth. Periodically, I stoke the fire and add more firewood, then I re-nestle beneath my blanket and continue to allow God's Truth to penetrate my heart. I find myself so overcome with joy and appreciation constantly, and I can't help but tilt back my head, my eyes smiling up through the skylight, through the frigid downpour...

It's like a song I'd like to hear played over and over again. Murmured words of thankfulness, rain chiming against glass window panes, warm light humming, a rustle of pages turning, the beating of a heart of one who knows they are ever-so loved... "you call forth songs of joy" (Ps. 65:8).